It happened overnight. One day we were fine and the next, it was all gone. Let's start from the beginning.

I met my soon to be ex-wife in the vast wilderness of Yosemite Park, CA. I had taken a position as chef de cuisine of one the park's historic hotels. We met a few months after my arrival and I was immediately attracted to her. She is a brunette with shoulder length hair, deep brown caring eyes and pearly white teeth set inside soft full lips that were made specifically for kissing. To me, this girl was captivating and I wanted to be with her forever.

Two weeks after our first date, I asked her to move in with me; four months after we met, we were joined together in marriage. Two months later and we moved to Washington D.C. to start our married life and begin to explore the wonders of the city and each other. As with all new married couples, most arguments are quickly resolved with heartfelt apologies and make-up sex. We had our share of these fights but quickly escalated to another level. Something was going wrong and we were growing apart.

After just one year of marriage, the feelings and love began to sour and she quickly became cold and distant. Now, I am not to say that I have no blame. We are humans and are fallible. In other words, it takes two to fight. However, the routine of our daily lives began to grow monotonous and we became complacent as well as argumentative. It seemed we were always looking for a problem. The issues of money, housework and the general challenges all couples face grew into constant finger pointing and blame. Something had to give.

Opportunity knocked in the way of a new position in a different state and we moved hoping this would alleviate our problems and renew our love for one another. The money was great, the hotel beautiful and, best of all, my friends from previous jobs were there. This was the answer we were hoping for. Sadly, it was the beginning of the end.

She had decided to not work and concentrate on her book, which is set to be published. I was in agreement with this and encourage her to take some time and enjoy herself. All I asked in return was for her, since I was working, to keep the house. Now, when I say this, I was not looking for the stereotypical 1950's housewife. You know the ones, high heels, flowing dress complete with pearls and a chocolate cake on a pedestal stand ready for dessert after a home-cooked meal. No, I just wanted her to keep it neat and clean up after herself. Apparently, this was too much to ask. Looking back, this, among other things, was always a point of tension between us. She always said that there is more to life than cooking and cleaning. I replied with the same answer, "How would you know if you don't do it?"

It had finally escalated and I, regrettably, told her to leave. This was one of the dumbest and hardest things I have ever done. She moved back to California with her family after giving away all my belongings to Goodwill and breaking the lease on our rented house, all while I was out of town. This was a devastating blow. I can live without certain creature comforts and furniture and clothes can be replaced, but a broken heart cannot. The time vested in this marriage is a pain I am constantly reminded of daily. Seeing a black Jeep, any type of monkey (she collected monkeys), a favorite song or simply knowing she is not there and not coming back is what makes it hurt more. It is said time heals all wounds, this may be true, but does the heart ever forget?

I had made a few unsuccessful attempts to reconcile but she has made it clear the marriage is done. As is common with divorce, blame, anger and name-calling step up and terrible things are said. We have just finished with this stage. The next step is the waiting period before we actually file for divorce, or, in our case, disillusionment. We have nothing left to fight over or contest since she gave everything away. Reality has set in, hard, and my heart is on a roller coaster ride from hell. Friends and family mean well when the say," It's for the best" or "You're better off without her." My favorite is "Just forget her." How? Have they lived through this pain? Some have and moved on. I will move on, but after I have had time to heal.

Dating at this time just does not seem right. We both had profiles on internet dating sites and I actually met a girl. Sadly, it was not for me. I am just not ready to commit when I still cannot forget. It doesn't seem right. She has since removed her profile. I am suspecting that she was not ready to accept rejection or heartbreak as well.
Honestly, the thought of her with someone else is the hardest of all. We are, legally, still married.

Once the disillusionment is finalized, she will go back to her maiden name and our past together will become another statistic. Some will remember we were once together and even express sorrow for the breakup. Others will not speak about it and forget it happened. I cannot do that. Despite everything that has happened, I still love her. After the hurtful words spoken (from both of us), the nasty emails and the way it all ended, I would welcome her back into my arms and softly whisper "I love you."

I know this is a dream that will never be realized and it probably is for the best. But when your heart falls in love then breaks, time may heal the wound, but the pain of the memories will always linger. I miss her.

The article The Heartbreak Of Divorce was Submitted by Richard Eckersberg through Articles.GetACoder.com network. Here's the additional information: I am a professional chef who njoys writing about the humor in veryday life.