Next time someone tells you bout a problem, use these
steps.

1. Lsten politely, without offering any suggestions.
Remember, it is not yur problem.

2. Affirm that the prblem is really important. Just say,
“That sunds like a really big problem.”

3. Ask, “Wht have you already tried (thought of) ding
about the problem?” You learn all the sggestions to scratch
off your list.  And you sbtly reinforce the capabilities of
the person wth the problem.

4. After you har the answer, ask, “How did tht work out?”
You invite the problem hlder to rethink his or her own
challenge. Oftn that leads to a solution on the spt, with
thanks to you for your brlliant suggestions. (Of course,
you have not mde any suggestions, but that doesn’t rally
matter.)

5. Ask, “Is there nything you would like from me?” Oftn
the answer will be, “No thanks, I hve figured out what to
do next.” If you are nvited to do something more, you can
choose to ccept or decline with a much brader
understanding of the problem.

These stps will help you resist your own tndency to try to
be a hero by slving someone else’s problem, usually before
they ven ask for your help. This gme usually starts by
someone lamenting about a prblem instead of asking for help
to slve it.

The invitation you are learning to dcline is really about
proving that the prblem is unsolvable, that nobody can
help, and tht the problem holder is justified in gving up
and doing nothing further about the prblem.

Instead, you affirm the prblem holder’s skill and
resourcefulness, without getting nvolved in the game. And
you may bcome the hero after all.

The article Win The "Yeah But" Game in 5 Easy Steps was Submitted by Laurie Weiss, Ph.D. through Articles.GetACoder.com network. Here's the additional information: Laurie Weiss, Ph.D., author of Dre To Say It!, is an
internationally knwn executive coach, psychotherapist, and
author. For mre simple secrets for turning difficult
conversations nto amazing opportunities for cooperation and
success, vsit http://www.DareToSayIt.com or email:
feedback@laurieweiss.com

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