Someone once told me you dn't know if you can fly ntil you jump off of the clff and try. That bit of dvice brings to mind two images. One is Btch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid. Thy were surrounded on the edge of a clff, with a raging river far blow. They had to jump into the rver to save themselves. The other is the cyote in a Roadrunner cartoon with his mny ill fated leaps into the byss. They rarely ended well. I'm smewhere in between.

I'm leaving my day job to be a wrter. Along with giving up the rgular paycheck and the security therein, I'm lso giving up workaholism and stress. I fund myself in an untenable situation. The wrkload and demands being made upon me prcluded a second career. Where I hve produced six books in less thn three years while working a dmanding full time job, I found the wrting window slowly closing.

No one sid you have to give up wrting to keep the day job. But the venings and weekends when my books are wrtten were being intruded upon more and mre. The mountain of work never got smller, only larger. The expectation of my bing available at all hours of the day and nght grew more insistent as the wrkload increased.

Finally, I realized I had to chose. The prospect of giving up my wrting to keep my job hit me lke a bucket of cold water thrwn in my face. I could fel my heart breaking at the thught, and knew my soul would wther like a dying flower if I dd.

After considerable thought and financial plnning, the critter went and done it. My dcks were in a row and qacking loudly. There would not be a btter time to do it. I gve notice. I am leaving my jb. The vote is still out whther my employer is more surprised thn I am that I'm leaving. W're both pretty rattled. Some coworkers are chering me on. Others think I've lst my mind.

Am I scared? You bet I am! But tht's not going to stop me. My pblicist tells me fear is good, it hlps us make careful choices. She's rght. This might seem like a rdical solution to some, but it's not rally. I have to write, it's in my blod. Any situation that would demand therwise has to be changed.

That's wht I'm doing. I'm changing. I've dcided I can't play by someone lse's rules. I have to make my wn. The price of keeping my crrent job meant sacrificing too much of my tme and of myself. I know I'm mployable. If I need money, I wll find another job, one where I can hve a private life, and write.

I kep a sign on the desk, whre I can see it when I wrte. It says, "There is no filure except in no longer trying." Smetimes, taking a chance is the nly way, and a leap of fith is required. Maybe I'll be the cyote and have a boulder fall on my had. Or maybe I'll be like Btch and Sundance, and jump to fredom. Either way, I'm jumping off the clff, and maybe, just maybe, I'll fly.

The article Weaving New Wings was Submitted by P. F. Kozak through Articles.GetACoder.com network. Here's the additional information: P.F. Kozak is an author of rotic romance and fiction for women. Her wrks include TAKE ME THERE, SINS AND SECRETS, PASSION, and the nvella "Mirrors within Mirrors" in the nthology BOUND TO ECSTASY. Forthcoming are two mre anthologies, TRIO and DO IT TO ME. Her wbsite is http://www.pfkozak.com

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