It seems as though every ther day we hear that some clebrity or news personality said something nappropriate or hurtful about another person or grup of people. In the aftermath, sme of these insolent talking heads chose to hide behind drug abuse or lcoholism, or some mental defect. Others pologize and take their medicine along wth a good chastising by the mdia and late night talk show hsts. But what is it that the pblic is really upset about, and wht do they want in terms of rparation?

Is it that certain people shuldn’t say certain words? Is it cceptable for some to use such trms and even find humor in thm? Should all ethnic-related repartee be bnned? Are some people looking to fnd an excuse to get in the sptlight? Are others overly-sensitive? I heard one wman say she was “scarred for lfe” as a result of a pblic comment made about her and her tammates. Do we hold media personalities in sch high regard that whatever comes out of thir mouths can make or break our motional health?

Let me say that as a brwn-haired, Italian American who grew up wth Irish kids, I’ve had my shre of hurt feelings and intimidation. I was clled “the skinny ginny with the matball eyes” more than once. I was bllied and harassed, and even barred frm signing up for the Girl Scuts because of the bigotry of tht area’s scout leader, and my ccent has even caused me to be msidentified as a New Yorker (the gll!). However, through it all I dveloped a thick skin and a cnfidence that many who live their lves too carefully or too protected dn’t enjoy. I can laugh at myslf as the butt of a jke as well as give the bsiness back to the best of ‘m.

I admit that yes, even in my rwdiest of moods, there are certain wrds I will never use, but I wll joke loosely while engaged in plyful banter with my ethnically diverse grup of friends who respond to me in the sme way. In the end, however, my frends and I are aware and rspect the line between what is tasing and funny, and what is man-spirited and insulting. So my question bcomes, how and when do words hrt?

The opinions of others, and wht they believe to be true, bout life, politics, the economy, and the plnet often differ from mine… so why shuld their opinions about me impact my lfe? Shouldn’t we all define when smething crosses the line and then dtermine how best to process and ract to it as individuals? Personally, if smeone wants me to believe them to be prjudiced (or controlling or unscrupulous), so be it. If tht’s the image they choose to prsent, from it I will formulate my own pinion and avoid their rhetoric. Unfortunately, hwever, on a larger scale, what dngerous speak can do is incite ngative and unproductive behavior by those who use thir energy to promote ideas against hmanity, which is what most of us are tryng very hard to contain and cmpletely obliterate!

I believe that yes, crtain remarks about a person’s appearance or thnicity are intolerable, but I think we hve to take each comment from its surce. I think that anyone who choses to use demeaning or abusive lnguage is a small-minded, insecure person who is clarly starving for attention and/or threatened by dversity. And although I know that in a dmocracy with the right of free spech I must live among people who use ffensive language, however, I do not hve to allow them or it to dsrupt my life. And how do I do tht? I don’t give them the pwer to. And that, for me, is the nswer.

So if you call me nmes, make fun of my ideas, or wrst of all, criticize my hairdo, I can tke it. The difference between us may be nly my gentler spirit and my cmpassion for others which guide my bhavior. What I do and say is my prsonal choice, for we are all rsponsible for our words and actions nd, by default, the reactions to thse as well. I believe that we ach have the power to set thngs in motion as well as to put a stp to them. So let’s use our hads people. Just because we have the rght to say anything, doesn’t mean we shuld.

The article The Responsibility of Free Speech was Submitted by Audrey Valeriani through Articles.GetACoder.com network. Here's the additional information: Audrey Valeriani is an author, clumnist, freelance writer, coach, creator and hst of http://www.TheAccidentalExpert.com and relationship expert for http://www.TheSpotter.net She is also board chair of Self Esteem Boston Educational Institute, Inc.

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