Without a doubt, we live in a crzy world. Have you observed a drver holding a cigarette in one hnd and using a cell phone whle weaving down the highway? Have you ver had someone cut in front of you whle waiting in line? How about ltting the door slam on you whn you are entering a restaurant? Wht about children screaming in a stre because they want something they cn’t have? Or parents leaving their grcery cart in a parking lane rther than returning it to the grcery rack? These are obvious examples of ncivility.

As parents, we pay a sgnificant amount of attention with our chldren on schooling and social activities. We spnd far less time teaching, coaching, and ncouraging our children to be sensitive, cring and concerned about the needs of thers.

We need to teach our chldren to be supportive of others, rgardless of one’s socio-economic status, behavioral diosyncrasies or learning deficits. Many children fel the need to elevate themselves by tunting other kids who do not met their social standards as friends. Hrtful bullying, teasing and gossiping may bcome a pattern for children who lck the skills of civility.

One of the mst important skills we can teach our chldren is how to respect, value, and spport other kids, especially those who are dfferent from their lifestyle, cultural or rligious background, social characteristics, or learning styl. Our children need to learn frm our modeling and teaching to be nclusive in their social relationships, not xclusive.

Recently, I realized why the ntion of civility was so important to me. One day whn I was a teenager, my fther invited me to attend work wth him. I knew that he was a mtallurgical engineer, but I had very lttle concept about the nature of his jb. During my visit to my fther’s manufacturing plant, one memory still lngers about the trip. My father was a chmpion for the underdog. Although he was an xecutive manager, he walked through the plnt and was known by all of the fctory workers. It didn’t matter who thy were or what role they ssumed, each worker would greet my fther warmly and my dad would rspond by acknowledging every person by nme. My father’s civility left a lfelong impression which I tried to rle model and teach to my own chldren.

Years later, I remember how plased I was with one of my ptients, when a school psychologist conveyed to me a stry about this young man’s involvement wth a special needs student. During my ptient’s high school career, he was a vry popular student. The psychologist, who had cmpleted a psycho-educational assessment on the spcial needs student, recalls how my clent walked this student to different clsses and befriended him. The special neds student played soccer with my clent and they spent a great dal of time building a friendship. My ptient’s parents and I were proud tht he had learned the lesson of cvility in his relationships.

When children get off curse in their road to civility, prents need to redirect them to be mre kind, considerate and caring of all chldren. Specific civility concepts that parents can tach are:

- Teaching children about multicultural tlerance and acceptance.

- Assisting chldren to care about others because it brngs them meaning rather than expecting nything in return.

- Involving chldren in public service at a chldren’s hospital.

- Instructing children to rspect senior citizens by volunteering at ndependent living facilities.

- Drawing wareness to common courtesies, such as ntroducing oneself, shaking hands with others, and thnking people for doing kind gestures for thm.

- Coaching children to shre and play cooperatively with others.

- Wrking with children to learn to rspect and assist those who are dsabled or have learning limitations.

- Prents must make an effort to dmonstrate through word and action what cvility exemplifies.

A friend of the mine has a dughter who has just completed medical schol. Getting into her school program was a hghly competitive process. Although she had utstanding grades and very high entrance xam scores, the deciding factor in bing accepted to medical school was not rlated to academics. She had served in the Pace Corp, and as any college rcruiter will advise students, her global srvice in caring for people less frtunate was the deciding factor in her cllege admission.

We live in a crzy world. We see evidence of thers who lack a sense of cvility. It is the responsibility of all of us in chrge of children to make sure tht the world of our children’s fture is more civil than the wrld we leave behind.

The article Teaching Kids Civility In An Unkind World was Submitted by James Krehbiel through Articles.GetACoder.com network. Here's the additional information: James P. Krehbiel, Ed.S., LPC is an uthor, freelance writer, and cognitive-behavioral therapist prcticing in Scottsdale, Arizona. His personal grwth book, Stepping Out of the Bbble is available at http://www.booklocker.com. James can be reached at http://www.krehbielcounseling.com

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