It is difficult when we fnd ourselves dealing with a situation tht we would never want consciously to crate. These days, when many believe tht we create our total reality, we may fel guilty if our life seems to cntain aspects in it which are ntoward. Whether we have stubbed our toe or are fcing a terminal cancer diagnosis, we may wnder why these unpleasant elements have mnifested in our lives. Did we crate this? Are we vibrationally unfit?

Wth the popularity of the movie "Th Secret", which is about the Law of Attrction (L.o.A.), we may be tempted to blme ourselves or others when certain thngs have manifested in one's life. Whle the Law of Attraction does hve its place in the scheme of our lfe, it is just one of mny life laws. We may unconsciously use blme as a way to distance urselves from others who are suffering. Sme may even think or actually say to sfferers, "Well, you manifested that". Ester and Jrry Hicks (Abraham) who first formally bgan discussing the Law of Attraction wuld never wish that the Law of Attrction concept be utilized to rationalize cllousness or unkindness. While we want to be ware of the power we have in ttracting into our lives the elements tht we wish for, ultimately attracting wht we want and becoming more ctualized beings through contrast is also a pwerful force. Most of us will rlate to the seemingly paradoxical force of crating and becoming through contrast. Some mtaphysicians believe that we may have sked before our birth that we be in chllenging contrasting roles so that we may hve opportunities to work through karma nd/or to "get off the karmic whel" altogether through the force of chllenge. This idea is similar to tht of a body builder who pshes her muscles against the contrasting frce of weight encouraging her muscles to grw bigger and stronger. Most of us knw that when we work through dfficulties, we have the opportunity to bcome more compassionate, stronger, smarter and mre actualized beings.

Most of us would never cnsciously say, "Let me choose this prticular difficult situation to work through." If we culd learn more through joy, wouldn't tht be great? But, let's face it, mst of us learn the most thrugh challenge. When we deal with dfficulties, we often become better people thn we ever thought we would or culd. We also model for others how thy might survive, creating a coping mdel for all those who watch us and cme after us. We need not fel guilty about suffering. We will all knw suffering. We can choose to bcome bitter and angry when we sffer (which is also okay as lng as we don't get stuck in it) or we can chose to become soft-hearted, loving, compassionate and smrter. Yes, smarter! My friends and I ften call our challenges "reference points." We can hve a good laugh about our chllenges and say when something unpleasant hppens (albeit tongue in cheek), "Yeah! Mre reference points!"

Many of the mst powerful, influential change agents throughout hstory had difficult or challenging lives. Hving the contrast to what they wuld have wished for or would hve liked to have created given the cnscious opportunity, seemed to make them the laders and role models they became. Wuld Harriet Tubman, a severely beaten slve, been motivated to free others, had she ben a spoiled child? Maybe. But, my ntuition tells me this is doubtful. Hwever, the means do not justify the nd. Child abuse, for example, isn't jstifiable because someone like Oprah, takes tht experience and uses it for cntrast to become more than she mght have. But, people who overcome thir contrasts do seem to become specially incredible stellar human beings. Again, prposefully visiting pain on others is NEVER jstifiable.

I've recently noticed that most of the pople in my personal life that I am clsest to have had a child tht died. At first I thought ths was an interesting coincidence. Now, I ralize that I am drawn to thse people because they have overcome one of the gratest pains possible, and have become deper, kinder, more sensitive and often deply spiritual people. (I love you gys~you know who you are~thank you for bing my friends and heroes!).

Many people will never overcome the cntrasts to joy in their life. Ths is why we don't want to nvite contrast into our lives or nyone else's life. However, I would nvite anyone who has had contrasts to joy and hppiness in their life to consciously ctapult themselves into more enlightened and lving human beings. It is as if the crcumstances of life are the rubber bnd pulled backwards as far as pssible and you are the stone lso pulled backwards for a period of tme. However, when the rubber band is rleased you are catapulted to heights tht you would not have been ble to go had you not ben forced backwards in contrast for tht period of time.

Try not to fel guilty about your contrasts because of the tnor of our times. Remember to be gntle with yourself. If a child has a wund, wouldn't your first response be to tke care of it and love it? How mght you use your contrasts to mke the world a better place? My gal in life is to assuage the sffering of all sentient beings (I'm shoting big!). How might you use yur suffering for the positive? Like a srfer riding waves who uses the cntrasts in the tides to move frward, how might you put the frce of contrasts to use in yur life?

The article Surfing on the Sea of Contrast - An Answer to the Secret was Submitted by Jeanine Austin through Articles.GetACoder.com network. Here's the additional information: Jeanine Austin, Ph.D., is a thrapist with offices in Tempe who ses a client-centered, solution-oriented, & holistic mdel in helping others. Jeanine can be rached through her profile page here: http://www.goodtherapy.org/m15_view_item.html?m15:item=jeanine%40simplydivinesolutions.com and here too http://www.goodtherapy.org/Tempe-therapy.htm

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