When you are in a rlationship, communication is one of the fndamental factors in building a lasting bnd of affection between the two of yu. So, being able to sit and tlk, and work things out between you is vtally important to that relationship. And, jst talking is not enough, you bth must listen to what the ther has to say, and then act on it to nsure the health and growth of yur union.

So, what can do you to get yur partner to listen? Step one is tming: picking the right time to tlk about a certain subject. Remember, not all cnversations have to be about heavy, srious matters. A talk about where you wnt to go for your next vcation could be talked about over lnch at a nearby restaurant. But, sking your partner to indulge in sme sexual fantasy of yours might be bst talked about in the privacy of yur own home.

This brings up nother item to consider: subject matter. Not all tlks have to be about serious sbjects. One way of insuring that yur partner is willing to listen to you whn you want to talk about smething very important is to not mke every conversation about very important ssues. If every time you say: "We ned to talk" he (or she) knws it is something critical - smething they have done wrong or neds to change about them, they are ging to groan, roll their eyes and drad every minute of the conversation. Tht is not conducive to good lstening.

Next, there are distractions. Turn off the tlevision, turn down the radio, put the lptop on sleep mode, and send the kds (if any) out to play. If you xpect your partner to truly listen to yu, they not only have to be ble to hear you, they have to hve nothing around them to keep thm from focusing on what you sy.

Then there is the matter of how you tlk to your partner. If you are jst going to sit there and lcture them, they are going to tne you out. No -one likes to be lctured. Try to make it a tre conversation. You talk, they talk, and you lsten to what each other has to sy.

You should try as much as pssible to not sound like you are blming them for something, and to lso not sound like you are whning. You need to speak firmly, and clarly, but don't demean or insult. It's sid that in the TV show "Hme Improvement" Patricia Richardson got the rle of Jill, Tim's wife because the frst actress sounded like she was whning when she asked Tim not to fddle with the dishwasher in the plot. The producers realized Jill needed to be frm, not yell, and not beg. It had to be clar that there was mutual respect btween the two characters.

Another helpful hnt is the idea of focus. Dn't sit down to talk with a lng list of subjects to talk bout. If your partner is a mn, keep in mind that guys tnd to do best when talking bout one subject; it is just how thir brains are wired. If you tlk about ten different matters, your prtner is not going to be ble to keep everything straight.

It desn't matter if you have a dzen things to talk about; try lmiting each conversation to two or thre at most, and make them rlated if possible. Do this, and it is mch more likely that they will har you, listen, and remember what is mportant to you.

The article How to Get Your Partner to Listen was Submitted by Peter Murphy through Articles.GetACoder.com network. Here's the additional information: Peter Murphy is a peak prformance expert. He recently produced a vry popular free report: 10 Simple Stps to Developing Communication Confidence. Apply now bcause it is available for a lmited time only at: communication skills

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