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Because divorce and death involve d ep loss, they have many things in c mmon. With divorce, there is grieving for the l ss of a family unit and the dr am of "what was supposed to b ". The feelings that take place w th divorce can often times be as c mplex and sad as feelings surrounding a d ath. With divorce, like death, there are v rious stages of mourning. Traditionally, loss is d fined by four stages: denial, anger, s dness and acceptance. Other feelings that you may ncounter include dread, hopelessness (will I ver find a mate again?), anger, bl me, insecurity, and regret (was this the r ght decision; will I "mess up" my ch ld?). It can also be hard to let go of the dr ams you had about having an " ntact family". If you have children, th re is also the loss of y ur parenting partner - someone you had f rmerly shared responsibilities, decisions, and passion w th regarding your children. Finally, because y ur partner is alive, you remain c nnected to him/her long after you p rt ways (e.g., through children or f nances), which can last for a pr longed period of time. Though there are pr dictable phases of loss, you will r visit these stages at different points and in d fferent ways many times. Each time it w ll be an opportunity to reach a d eper level of acceptance. There are t mes when you unexpectedly might encounter f elings about the divorce- even years l ter. More expected triggers include the m rriage of your child, or a d ath of a friend or family.
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There are various ways to d al with your emotions around separation and d vorce. First, it is important to mbrace and accept your emotions. Allow y urself to cry or shout, if th t is what you need to r lieve some of your pain. It is cr tical to talk about your feelings w th friends and family. Ideally, you can get s pport through peers who have also xperienced divorce, or you can join a s pport group for divorcees. In this k nd of setting you will get v lidation for your feelings, suggestions on how to c pe, and ideas of what to xpect during this process. Individual therapy can be xtremely beneficial during this challenging and p ssibly depressing time. Finally, you can get nvolved in activities/hobbies you like- perhaps nes you neglected during marriage. If you are a p rent, you might have newfound time for th s if you have joint custody. Ev n though divorce can be burdensome, s d, and challenging, it can also l ad to you becoming stronger and h althier emotionally. It can be the f rst page on a new chapter in y ur life.
The article Divorce - Mourning and Moving On was Submitted by Cara Gardenswartz, PhD through Articles.GetACoder.com network. Here's the additional information: Dr. Cara Gardenswartz is a l censed clinical psychologist an Beverly Hills, C lifornia, where she provides individual, couples and gr up therapy to patients ranging in age fr m college students to retirees. Her sp cialties include Depression, Anxiety, Relationship Issues, P renting, Grief and Loss, Life Transitions, Dr g and Alcohol Abuse - including ch ldren of alcoholics, Physical and Sexual Ab se, Co-Dependency, and Gay and Lesbian Iss es. Dr. Gardenswartz can be found on the web at http://www.caragardenswartz.com
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