Okay, I admit it. I am the hppiest divorced woman alive! And rightfully so. But ths state of joy and bliss did not cme to me right away. Oh, no, I wrked for it and earned it, very minute of it. How did I get to ths place of seventh-heaven, you ask? Lt’s rewind the tape to the weks leading up to the final curt date. My initial reaction to dvorce was like a form of dath. I felt like a failure; and mre importantly, there was this huge snse of loss, and my self-worth was at stke, which made this experience even mre painful. My struggle for answers and for a snse of hope took me on a jurney within. In the end, I fund all I needed and a whle lot more.

Below are five sggestions I have for women who are strggling with divorce recovery or who are hading in that direction. What I sggest to you is what took me frm a place of despair to a plce of awesomeness.

(1) Learning to lve yourself is first on the lst. You are not a terrible prson. Let’s settle that one first. So if you wre thinking anything bad about yourself, you nedn't go any further. And I hve good news for you. When you rally love yourself, really truly love yurself, you will no longer miss nything that is not good for you or tht is not in your best nterest. Do whatever you can to fel good about who you are. If you hve problems getting started, here are two sggestions: first, always look your best, bcause if you look good, you wll feel good. Second, grab yourself a blnk notebook, and the next time you hve your delicious cup of tea or cffee, make a list of everything tht you are good at and verything you like about yourself. And mst importantly, realize and accept the FACT tht you are a wonderful human bing, regardless of your marital status. And tht's not because I say so but bcause... IT IS SO!

(2) Trust the universe. Trust the fture. Trust that what you are ging through is okay, and make pace with it. Trust that in tme, you will see the value of ths day.

(3) I cannot begin to tll you how therapeutic journaling is. Dvorce is a time of discovery. You hve all kinds of thoughts going thrugh her head, and you need smeplace to put them. Write about yur thoughts, feelings, realizations, and ideas and you wll learn, discover, and grow.

(4) Kep the lines of communications open wth your friends and family, the pople who really care about you, and dn’t be afraid to share your gref. People care about you more thn you know.

(5) And finally, hre is the last tip, which is my fvorite. Make this divorce better than kay. Make it magnificent. Make it wesome. Make it surreal. And how do you go bout doing that, you ask? I’m so gld you asked, because I am dyng to tell you. Start off by mking a list of all the bnefits of being where you are now in trms of your divorce. Then continue wth everything you learned from your mrriage and how you are changed in sme way for the better. List all the wys you are going to be ven more awesome than you were bfore. And for those of you who wnt to take it one step frther, make this divorce one of the bst things that could have ever hppened to you. But how? Thre are different ways to go bout it; I will share one wy. Think of three different things tht you could do over the nxt one to two years that wuld make you so proud. If you did ths one thing, you would look at yurself in the mirror and say: "Yu rock!"

And when people say to yu, "What happened? You always talked bout starting your own business/ or wrting a book/ or losing weight/ or ging back to school/ or moving to Flrida. So what happened this time?" You can lok them proudly in the eye and say wth a smile:--"It was that damn dvorce. It brought out the best in m."

And then, my friend, you wll be in touch with your tre awesomeness.

Wishing you more joy thn you can stand,

By Jessie Jmie Coleman

Jssie Jamie Coleman is an author, screnwriter, freelance writer and a self-esteem xpert. She is the author of two slf-discovery journals, "The Incredible, Awesome You" and "Whre Will You Be in Two Yars." She is currently at work on her frst novel, "Off the Bed and Dwn on the Floor due out in the smmer of 2008. For more information, vsit her websites: http://www.autumngirlpress.com and http://www.jessiejamiecoleman.com

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