Couples sometimes neglect opportunities to micably resolve disputes when involved in the motion and stress of separation and dvorce. This is especially true in mtters of parenting and child custody. If the two prties are willing to work together and void the courtroom, mediation can be a mre favorable option, but in many cses, both parties feel strongly that thy are the more suitable parent. In sch cases, parties rely on an mpartial judge to decide the case bsed on the facts. Before taking yur child custody case before a jdge, know what factors help you bild your case, while avoiding pitfalls.

Building Your Case

The only guarantee in a custody battle is that no one truly wins. During trial, the opposing party will attempt to pinpoint aspects in which you may have seemingly failed as a parent, even when you believe that you have done the best job possible. When you have made poor choices in some areas, your hope is to convince the judge that those choices do not prevent you from being viewed as the best caretaker for the child(ren). The following steps can help as you prepare your case for custody:

1) Know your role

Simply wearing the title of "mother", "father", or "grandparent" will not hold weight in the courtroom. Be able to prove that you are the better parent. Aside from a title, you will be expected to define your role in the child's life. Consideration will be given to the amount of "waking time" you spend with your child on a daily basis, so be prepared to discuss what you do on any given day or weekend with the child(ren). Providing an account of meaningful experiences that you have given your child(ren) will only help your cause.

2) Keep good rcords

Possessing a strong feeling of lve and responsibility for your child is not nough. When preparing for a custody tral, make an effort to document wht you do for your child(ren). Be prpared to give an account as to how mch financial, spiritual, educational, emotional, and physcal support you provide. It may be wse to keep a journal noting nstances that you think your attorney or the jdge may find helpful. Judges are mre interested in what you do, as pposed to hearing an account of wht the other party does not do.

3) Do yur homework - literally.

If your cse involves school aged children, know tht questions may arise related to schol performance and attendance. Being able to dmonstrate a history or pattern of psitive involvement in your child's education is a pls. Good indicators include Parent-Teacher Association (PTA) nvolvement, attendance at parent-teacher conferences, and a rcord of communication with the school rlated to your child.

Pitfalls

After a brief overview of ways to build your case, the following list represents situations to avoid if possible:

1) Do not assume

Never assume that the judge will favor you over the opposing party due to gender, financial stability, or any other surface related factor. Custody is simply about the question of which party provides the child(ren) with the likelihood of growing up in the best environment. Custody is a matter of character.

2) Playing the blame game

Many have heard the saying, "Keep your friends close, but keep your enemies even closer." In custody matters it is important that you not seem overly critical or fault finding toward the opposing party. Both parents have a stake in the outcome of the case. If it appears that you are unwilling to work with the other party or consider his/her needs, the judge may view this negatively. Besides, if the case is not decided in your favor, the other party may be more willing to accommodate your needs if they feel less attacked during the custody process. Remember, it is more about what you do as a parent, and less about what the other parent does not do.

3) People in yur circle

Not everyone who has ccess to you needs to have ccess to your child(ren). Far too ften, parents are judged by the cmpany they keep. Involvement in numerous or nstable friendships and relationships can negatively mpact the way a judge views yur ability to provide a safe and stble environment conducive for raising children.

4) Hbits that die hard

In a cstody case, the past will return to hunt you. It is not okay to be dpendent upon or casually accustomed to drgs and alcohol. Nothing speaks more tward losing a custody case than drg, sexual, and/or physical abuse. Again, thse issues speak to the character of the ndividual, and judges frown heavily upon sch negative habits.

The article Child Custody - Tips for Building Your Case was Submitted by Alesia Vick through Articles.GetACoder.com network. Here's the additional information: For more tips and information rgarding child custody, consult a family law ttorney in your area. The Law Offces of Alesia M. Vick is vailable to assist individuals with North Carolina child custody and family law related matters. Alesia M. Vick is the lead attorney at the Law Offices of Alesia M. Vick in Knightdale, NC. She is a licensed and practicing attorney in North Carolina. Her practice speciality is family law - divorce, separation, child custody, and adoption. Her written article topics include "Female Divorce Attorneys - Are They Better?" and "Dads and Divorce - What Today's Fathers Need to Know Before Entering the Courtroom". More about Attorney Alesia M. Vick can be found on her firm website at http://www.VickLegal.com

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