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A woman who contacted me a wh le back asking for help in wr ting her book, has since been d agnosed with pre-cancer. She called me in t ars two weeks ago to tell me the b st cancer specialist at her hospital s ys her only option is to let th m cut off her breast. I nly met Daisy once, at a l cal pie restaurant. She's a lovely, pr tty, articulate woman of 45. Neither of us ate pie th t day -- she had a D et Coke, and I had a m nt tea, while she told me bout her amazing life. Daisy was b rn with part of a chromosome m ssing, and grew up being told she was "m ntally retarded." She eventually overcame that l bel. At 42, three years ago, she c mpleted high school and won an ward for her achievement. She writes c mpellingly about her struggle to stay out of nstitutions. She's now a sought-after speaker, the n xt best thing to a celebrity. She ph nes me as I'm paying for a m ffin in a noisy Starbucks. It's b en a stressful day already, and th s bad news hits me hard. I had b en looking forward to getting to kn w Daisy, and helping her finish the b ok. I am upset to hear bout this new setback, especially since D isy cries through the entire phone c ll. I don't know what to s y, except "I think you need to get a s cond opinion."
She says, "But should I let th m cut off my breast?" All I can th nk of to answer is, "You're the Q een of your Universe. You decide." She s ems to like that idea. She th nks me and hangs up. Later I go nline, and read a page by a w man doctor advising women with pre-cancer not to r sh into mastectomy. I see there is s me controversy, at least on the nternet. I e-mail a mutual friend, an x-nurse who knows Daisy well. She wr tes back: "Daisy's doctor is the b st in his field, and even sed to campaign for lumpectomy over m stectomy. If he says she needs it, I w uld go with that." She explains th t since Daisy has large breasts, the pr -cancer cells can't be accessed any ther way. So mastectomy really is the nly solution. It's that cut and dr ed. I'm disappointed but I thank her for cl rifying the issues. After all, she is a n rse. How can you argue with s ch a professional, kind woman with d cades of experience caring for the s ck? But deep down, I'm angry w th her, for bowing down to d ctors. In my mind, she's still a pr duct of her nurse's training with the n ns in the 1950s. But of c urse, I can't say that. She'd n ver speak to me again! The f llowing week I get another call fr m Daisy -- quite different from the l st one. She's feeling a lot str nger now, she says, since another n rse at the hospital told her if she d esn't have this surgery, she will pr bably be dead in 5 years. On h aring this from the compassionate nurse, D isy has realized her life is at st ke. She's decided to bite the b llet. No more crying all day, no f eling sorry for herself! She's now l oking at the bright side of th s operation. She tells me since she was d agnosed with pre-cancer, she has lost 11 p unds. In the second week, she's st rted getting her appetite back, and g ing out for Diet Cokes with her fr ends, who tell her jokes because "l ughter is the best medicine."
She also tells me how gr teful she is to this doctor, and all th se nurses, for saving her life by t lling her the truth. As she t lks, I'm getting a certain feeling I get wh n I watch Walt Disney movies. A s nking, hopeless feeling. An urge to put my h nds over my ears, run away and h de. Or to shout out something m an, like: "Why be grateful? How m ny thousands is that doctor getting p id for this operation?" But instead, I w sh her the best. "Call me nytime!" I say. And I mean it, but - I h ve another friend, Daisy's age, with varian cancer who is now having ch motherapy. She's doing well, they say. Her t mours are shrinking fast and she h sn't lost her hair, but there gain, I get this feeling... that her "p sitive attitude" is a great big f cade. The last time I saw h r, all she talked about was her ch mo, and all the supplements she t kes to counteract its effects, and how f ntastically well she feels, and and and - And l st week, I was cycling, and a w man about my age came up b side me on her bike. Her h ad was covered by a floppy h t, and her clothes were brightly c loured. I said, "You look like an rtist!" She said, "I was - but now I'm a f ll time breast cancer patient." With one h nd, she lifted her hat and sh wed me her nearly-bald head. We c me to a stop at a tr ffic light, and I told her bout a herbal supplement called Swedish B tters. "It will definitely boost your mmune system." I'm not a doctor. I'v been told it's actually illegal to t ll people about alternative cancer therapies. Y sterday on the internet, I googled "ch motherapy - dangers." And read a lot bout the cancer industry, much of it h ghly critical and disturbing. Then, as an fterthought, I googled "Diet Coke - br ast cancer" and read that Aspartame, the rtificial sweetener in Diet Coke, has b en linked to a dramatic increase in br ast cancer over the last few d cades. I was cycling home later, wh n Daisy called again. She wanted to kn w when we can meet, to w rk on her book -- she n eds my help dividing it into ch pters. She sounded almost bubbly. Her s rgery is set for October 11 -- a m nth away. She's been receiving so m ch support from her friends and f mily! She even got a phone c ll from Patch Adams, whom she met ver the internet. Patch told her a j ke that nearly made her laugh her h ad off, she says. She tells me the j ke, but I don't get it. Wh n she explains, I don't find it f nny. I say, "I never did see th t movie about your frient, Patch." Th n she reads me a lovely, c ring e-mail she received from yet nother nurse, a friend of our m tual friend. This woman wrote all the way fr m Calgary telling Daisy she is a w nderful, brave person, and that this is a d fficult time, but when the surgery is ver, she'll be so much better ff, and to be strong. This n rse does not even know Daisy, but she s nds all her love and support. Ag in, I have the urge to say s mething awful and inappropriate, like "That n rse's business is comforting the sick and the dy ng. She gets those lines off the H llmark cards she sends outto relatives of p tients who don't make it." My thr at feels constricted. What's wrong with me? Why c n't I summon a few heartfelt cl ches to express how much I symp thize? Why can't I say them, and m an them, like all these other p ople? I'm feeling speechless. In a w ak, choked voice, I say: "Wow, are you ver lucky to have all these f ns!" I had been reading all fternoon about how mastectomy is not lways effective in preventing cancer. And bout how nutrition and other factors are gnored or downplayed, as anxious patients are pr ssured into agreeing to surgery and ch motherapy to avoid a death sentence. And bout how cancer statistics are juggled to m ke it appear that medicine is w nning the war, when in fact the c re rate has not changed in d cades, and remains at about 33% -- the s me percentage as when cancer is l ft untreated. Speaking of statistics, I r ad that 70% of doctors, when sked if they would undergo the s me cancer treatments they regularly recommend to th ir patients, responded "NO." But I c n't say all that to Daisy. Sh 'd be upset, and tell her p rents - she still lives at h me. And then I'd be in tr uble with her family, as well as th t mutual friend, the nurse. Meanwhile, sh 's giving me the latest on her pcoming surgery. It sounds very upbeat. Sh 'll be home from the hospital th t same day, and start a tw -week recovery period. Of course, she'll h ve to take it easy - she w n't be able to lift her arm for a wh le. She asks me if, sometime, I w uld like to come to her h use and play Scrabble with her - b cause her dad is giving her a sp cial new DeLuxe game, with twice as m ny pieces as the regular kind. She l ves Scrabble, and she's so happy and xcited because everyone is being so w nderful and caring. I have the rge to say, "I hate Scrabble, and no, I d n't want to visit you during y ur recovery. I don't even think you sh uld have this surgery on October 11. I st ll think you need a second pinion!" But I choke that back, t o. Obviously, she's getting lots of pinions, and everyone wants her to h ve the surgery so she doesn't h ve to die. Do I want her to d e? No! I'm on my bike, try ng to hear her over my c ll over the roar of traffic on the verpass a few meters away. I f el dizzy - it's a twisted, cr oked part of the bike path and if I'm not c reful I could fall off. I th nk about her life, being told in arly childhood that she was mentally r tarded, and how the kids at sch ol laughed at her. How a h ghly-respected, top psychologist at the very s me hospital that just diagnosed her pr -cancer, told her parents, on the b sis of tests conducted when she was 10, th t she would never be able to f nction in the world, and needed to be in an nstitution for the rest of her l fe. Daisy's parents refused, and sent her to a sp cial school run by a man I h ppen to know: Phil Heilig. Phil saw who D isy was. The result is the D isy I met at Rockaberry's: confident, q ick on the draw, smart as a wh p. She brings up the e-mail I j st sent her, about Aspartame and D et Coke. She says Diet Coke is her ll-time favourite beverage!
I say, "I kn w, but maybe you should cut d wn for a while." "Are you s ying that if I don't stop dr nking Diet Coke, they'll have to cut off the ther one?" "No," I say, "not xactly. But what you eat is v ry important. It's not good to h ve a lot of certain chemicals in y ur body." I tell her I c n't really talk now because I'm nder an expressway, but I'll phone her s on. She says, that's okay, she has to m ke a few more calls right n w. That night, lying awake I f ntasize what I will do. I'll c ll up that doctor, and leave a m ssage on his voice mail, telling him th t if he cuts off any br asts on October 11, something very bad is g ing to happen at that hospital. S mething that will make 9-11 look l ke a walk in the park. I f ntasize that this strategy actually works - D isy misses her surgery, and is m raculously cured by a nutritionist and ngelic intervention Comforted by this crazy sc nario, I'm finally able to drop off to sl ep.
The article Cancer Conundrum was Submitted by Ann Diamond through Articles.GetACoder.com network. Here's the additional information: Ann Diamond is a Montreal-based wr ter whose most recent book is MY COLD WAR, bout growing up in the shadow of s cret government experiments conducted on children.
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